My UFO (unbelievably fabulous observations)

[Gardener]

BM & hm,

if you've spent your whole life trying not to be a bother, how do you switch into a more "I'm worth it and I expect to be treated with love, respect, kindness, protection, and leadership?" attitude?

There's the rub, Hmama! Changing the behaviour. I have the same problem.

Keep this with you or someplace where you'll see it often:

If you always do what you've always done then you'll always get what you've always gotten.

Or, better yet, write this down and keep it with you.
May not always work, but I think it's a good in-your-face reminder not to do what comes naturally, automatically.

Decades of automatic "self-less" behavior is tough to buck (says the man who is struggling mightily through No More Mr. Nice Guy).