My UFO (unbelievably fabulous observations)

[hoosiermama]

thanks, gardener. and sadly, it's not just emotional widowhood, it's also emotional orphan-ing--D14 has had next to no support from friends, family, school, church(es). but had her father died rather than left us for an adulterous relationship, all of those groups would have gathered round and supported her, made sure she had resources to get thru it. People ought to be ashamed, really. I actually told her principal that--that by failing to address bullying by other students and one particular teacher, he's made a difficult time in her life even worse. No response, of course.

I have a second interview next week (St. Patrick's Day) with the medical director/primary investigator (it's a research position). he wasn't able to be there yesterday because of child care issues. I'm really bummed about perhaps not being able to finish out the school year--I'm hoping somehow things will work out otherwise. If I get hired, that is!

I had an interesting revelation today that keeps unfolding for me. Can't remember the thread, but it was a discussion about what women want in men--to be loved, respected, cherished, protected, and to have leadership. and it dawned on me--YES!! absolutely. I've been in marriages where I had to do it all--and felt disrespected, unloved, certainly never protected but often abandoned during bad times. For years I hated myself for being unable to resolve my persistent resentment--but it was about that. And somehow I expected myself, as a 20th century professional woman, not to need those things. I just didn't get it. Now, stepping back and having some perspective, I get it. I was aware that I made poor choices--but I don't think I really understood quite why they were poor, so I wasn't sure I'd ever trust myself again. I feel like a weight has been lifted!!!