The journey begins

[ClingingToHope]

I forgot whose sitch it was that I read when the LBS -- a man -- went in to confront the WAS as he was picking up his 9-year-old. He just wanted to ask why she was ruining his life.

Well, predictably, it didn't go well.

So instead of calling W to complain I called a friend in Virginia, my aunt in Canada and my sister in Minnesota. So I spent $10 on long distance to get it out of my system.

I will say I was pretty distracted last night and didn't fully enjoy the night with the girls. But there will be lots of others.

Today I took a deep breath and am banking on the fact there's no way she can win all of what she asked for. There's a long way to go.

Then I did what I've always done -- start formulating a plan. I talked to a bankruptcy attorney I know and he gave me some tips. Then I went online to see if I passed the means test for Chapter 7 and I did with flying colors.

This is a joke. It means I'm seriously screwed, but that means I'll be able to eliminate the credit card debt in bankruptcy.

He wasn't sure if I'd be able to eliminate my 401(k) loan as part of it. He was going to look into that. If I did, I'm sure I'd have to pay a penalty.

After the bankruptcy is done I can pull money out of the IRA, which will get a boost from W's retirement split, to pay off my car.

Just the credit cards would save me $220 a month in interest. Paying off the car would be another $270. Getting rid of the 401(k) loan would be $240.

I would be able not only to live but to thrive. I actually enjoyed doing this. For once I can control something. I've been bailing "us" out for years from W's overspending binges. Now I was figuring a way to bail out myself.

I did get a call today from W. D11's teacher called both of us this morning to say her grades have been slipping the past couple of weeks.

W wanted to talk about it for five minutes. I listened. Didn't add much and waited to get her off the phone. At one point it seemed as if she was fishing for me to buy D11 some gym shoes, but she didn't actually ask so I said nothing.

I actually felt no urge to jump in and talk about the D stuff. I'm not going to beg or plead. Now that it's going on, it's a very serious game and -- W has never been one to think ahead, plan or really analyze things -- she can't seriously think she's going to get all that she asked.

So today is a good day.