I'd like to add one more perspective from a woman. I agree with Rob above - that was LEADERSHIP in your family. Women look for leadership, respect, kindness, protection and love in men. Forget the "bad boy" thing... I don't know where that came from! Its the traits the show confidence in yourself and your ability to lead your family that we like most. That's what women are attracted to. The whole "Nice Guy" stigma seems to have been confused in previous posts - male and female interpretations of what that means. Go figure.... Us ladies typically see the above traits as someone being a "Nice Guy" ... you guys typically see the walk all over me, I would do anything for you just don't leave me behaviors as "Nice Guy"..
I can attest to this. I was in such a sad state for a few years with depression and no self-esteem that I did nothing but mope and say poor me when I was at home. I drained all attraction out of my life and she finally said enough with this wimp. When I was depressed I blamed the world for my problems and shut down. EVERYBODY walked all over me!!! She noticed and finally she thought she would be better off without me or with a man who was like I used to be. Especially since she did not want our son acting like me.
But that woke me up and I have done a 180 in my whole life and things are getting beter. I have always been the nice guy until you push my borders, then it was time to stand my ground. Except in the depression years. Now that she sees that I am confident again and am stable things are starting back the right direction. But all of the people on here helped me as well. But T said it the right way I think in your thread!!! What she said will help you and try to stay strong and get your life back on track and at least you can be happy and secure. She will notice once you make lasting changes. My wife has and I think she is holding out to see if it is truly a change or a paper tiger. All I can say is I feel great and the changes are permanant, I hope you can do that too. You need to be happy with yourself truly!!!!
