Are you still attracted to your Ex?

[AtTheEnd?]

It's a really slow process. The WAS spouse is typically looking at all options. Constantly comparing the LBS to others. Others look like the better option at first, but as time passes, and the anger fades, the WAS starts to slowly remember the good parts of the marriage, becoming nostalgic. This process is very slow, but the more that you work on yourself, the better the option you become. The others have to be better and better over time, until ultimately they have to be Brad Pitt, or whatever the ideal woman is. The irony to the whole situation is that the more time that passes, the more the LBS doesn't want the WAS.

Currently, most LBS are working on themselves, growing, becoming better individuals. Sometimes they become frustrated not seeing the same growth in the WAS. The WAS has to sort of see what the other side holds, and thus grows only when they experience some sort of setback or tragedy (typically getting dumped in a relationship). Hopefully this doesn't happen, but as time passes, the LBS turns and doesn't look back any longer. They are tired of waiting for the WAS to grow, or get so frustrated at the slow rate.

You have this knowledge and hopefully can curb your impulses. Ultimately, you need to look at your long term goal. What do you want, and you will likely re-evaluate every day. Think of it as the scales of justice. Currently, you are holding the scale, are blindfolded, and the sands are heavy on the side of divorce. The more time that passes, and the better you become puts a little bit of sand on the side of reconciliation. How long can you hold the scale? When will this become too heavy? How much patience do you have to let the small trickle of reconciliation pour into the lighter side?