of course you make sense...but listen to what h says...
Quote: After a couple of minutes I say "One thing that would help, I think, is if we could talk about what things you were angry or unhappy with before your a."
He said "you want to talk about how I felt in the past?"
neither of you are the same person as you were in the past...believe it or not you BOTH have learned and grown from this experience.
Instead of looking for reasons why what happend happend (sheesh I hate to use the same word twice)...keep looking for ways to keep things from happening.
I know I know...how can I keep it from happening if I don't know why it happend.
let go of that line of thinking...going back there and trying to figure it all out isn't going to get you to where you want to be...stay in the now and work toward something that is better.
I'm glad that h was able to talk to you about this and I'm very glad that you let him know that what he is doing is helping. Sometimes our feelings about "stuff" are just that OUR feelings and they have very little to do with what our spouse is or isn't doing to help us with them.
oh and I must tell you how happy I was to read this
Quote: We get home and I use my idea of earlier (formulated with LL's help) and decide to use mention of FF as a sign that I need to speak h's LL...I mention to him a coupon in the paper for a BBQ place and suggest that we go sometime soon (QT).
always happy to know that I've helped especially someone who helps so many round here.
