Well, I'm not your wife and have only heard the sitch from your side but mainly it is guilt which turns into anger imo. She is a woman, she has broken up her family and she has to justify/ cope with her decision somehow. Remember she has to live with her childrens reactions etc and at some level deep down will feel a huge amount of guilt about that.
All this anger is about her not about you. You need to concentrate on what is best for you and your children and make sure that she adheres to including you in their life as much as the law will allow.
I don't think not responding is weak, I see it as stronger than engaging in her spew. It only reinforces her perception of you. Don't engage in it.
Please protect yourself Mark, document everything. She is not going to play fair imo and you need to be ready. What is important is you and your children.
