A few of the posts on this particular subject in this particular thread refer more to idealistic views more than what reality actually tells us.
In general, people tend to idealize a lot (mindful I separated "alot" for you based on that previous correction, thanks btw)
"I want someone who wants me for me!" "A real true woman loves nice guys!" "Nice guys don't have to change to get a great woman, they should just be themselves and they'll find that special someone perfect for them" "I want a partner who is my equal!" "I want to be honest and share all of my feelings and thoughts with my wife!" "I want my wife to look past the fact that I'm overweight, overly sensitive, lazy - I want her to love me for ME!" "Isn't marriage about better or worse, this isn't fair, she should just love me as I am and not judge me or have high expectations!"
Ok, you hopefully get my point, I could go on and on making a $hitload of idealistic examples but lets all be be honest, review all the threads on these forums, being idealistic like this has no effect on the current situations.
In an ideal world these things would all be great and true.
Let's face it, we don't live in an "ideal" world. In an ideal world, you would be accepted for who you are, spouses wouldn't cheat & have affairs, marriages would last forever, there would be no fighting, a man could be "nice guy" and get the most beautiful girl in the world, "bad asses" and "bad boys" wouldn't attract women at all, a man could cry and express his feelings to his wife without scaring her or making her want to leave him. If people did make the rare mistake in an ideal world, we would forgive them because we love them so much. In an ideal world spousal abuse (in all it's forms) would never exist, love would last forever and divorces wouldn't exist and neither would this website.
In an ideal world these things would be great.
But we don't live in an ideal world.
How do I know we don't live in an ideal world? Easy... you're reading this post right now. This site exists.
So you can learn to accept that we don't live in an ideal world and adapt to it and all of it's quirks and achieve our goals faster or....
You can continue to live on planet Fruitopia.
Real world or Ideal world. Observe reality, follow reality, reality works. If you go against reality, don't complain later that what you did didn't work as you had hoped because you were idealistic instead of being realistic.
