If you are adult, you make good, healthy, emotionally satisfying choices. All of my friends who are divorced & now remarried, or widowed and remarried or married later in life, all of them chose the Nice Guy. Consistently, they are all very happy. And at peace.
fyi - people tend to get less picky when the available choices aren't as numerous as they previously were the first time around ;-)
This is a deflective response designed to minimalize the comments that were made.
This is where I fall off the track with those of you espousing the "man doctrine." Women are not looking for hard asses. Being nice does not equal being weak or feminine.
Cesco needs to be more assertive, not necessarily more manly. Allowing another person to walk all over you is NOT a feminine characteristic. It's a sign of a person who lacks confidence and assertiveness. Neither of these attributes are uniquely male or female.
Yes, some men have stopped filling the role of a man. I tend to think this is not because they have stopped being men, but instead that they stopped paying attention to the things they are supposed to be paying attention to. When we ignore our spouse becasuse of complacency or laziness, it's not that our masculinity is failing. It's that we're lazy and complacent.
Chances are good that Cesco was a nice guy when he and his wife met and fell in love. Chances are good that she fell in love with him in part because he was a nice guy. I agree wholeheartedly that true women want and admire (and yes, fall in love with) nice guys.
Why do the movies and commercials so often show men using babies and puppies to win the attention of a woman. Because seeing a man be gentle and caring, and yes, NICE, are attractive to women.
If I was hoping to hook up with the female bouncer at the local Harley bar, then I'd go the hardass, manly man route. That's probably what she's looking for. But, that being said, I wouldn't think that Hilda at the Harley bar is probably a great marriage prospect.
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
