Have you considered the possibility that your wife wants to move out of state both to get a fresh start AND to get away from the place where she fell?
I'm sorry you lost your job. I know times are very difficult right now economically. Are you working hard to find another job? Are you lining something up to keep some income flowing while you search for something in your area of expertise?
How genuine is your wife's desire to rebuild your marriage? I'm asking what your gut tells you about this, not what your hopeful heart wants to believe. We're not there, so we don't know how she is acting, the tone in her voice, the body language - all those things that send the messages that are not in their words.
What is your take? Is she remorseful for her indiscretion and longing to start over with you again? Or do you get the impression that she simply has nowhere else to go and is turning to you because you are the familiar?
I think these questions, and your honest answers to them, will direct your steps.
If she is legit, then you have a work in front of you. You need to handle that work with compassion, empathy, and with eyes wide open. You need to build her up, not tear her down. You need to show her that she was right to believe that you would continue being her rock through the tough times.
If she is not legit, then you should not be taking steps that make it look like you are reuniting, for whatever reason. There is nothing loving in allowing yourself to be used by someone, even if they are a person that you love dearly. If you KNOW inside that she is NOT done, moving back in together will only be a temporary thing.
You have questions and you would like answers. I say that you have the answers inside of you if you will assess what is going on honestly.
Blessings,
Bill
"Don't tell me the sky is the limit when there are footprints on the moon."
