When did you exchange this info? Today?

I certainly hope not.

Re family functions.

YOU CONTACT his family members DIRECTLY and exchange gifts privately, you call his mother and father privately to wish them the best, you do NOT go wtih him or meet him there.

It IS possible to have a relationship with his family whithout him involved.. it IS strained I know, but that's the POINT, it humiliates him that his wife w'nt talk to him.. his WHOLE family feel the pain of his wife when this happens

your ABSENCE is pressure.. USE that.