Looking for help with WAW

[mza8]

You never know which personality you are going to get from contact to contact

Boy, isn't that the truth. When I meet with my W, alone, I feel like I can bring out the W I married. It seems like when she goes back around some of her family or friends, she changes. Her sister, who my W is living with now, called my W twice while my W and I met this past Sunday. I don't think her sister is a bad influence but I'm not sure how much she helps the sitch. Sometimes I think it would be best if my W would get her own apartment so she would move out of her sister's house. I think it might do my W good to be alone for a while without any influence from anyone.

I know that I sound strong in these posting, but believe me, IT IS HARD. Saying it is one thing, doing it is a whole different thing.

Well, like they say, fake it until you make it, right? All we can do is try to stay strong and continue to work to save our marriages.

My wife and I talked for a half hour by phone today. We talked about house, etc. It was a very friendly conversation. No R talk at all. We agreed on most everything we talked about today. I agreed to to do a lot of what she wanted. She complimented me on some of the things I have done with house and efforts I have made making calls to take care of everything. I was surprised that she felt comfortable to give me this sincere compliment.

My W seems much more comforable talking with me on the phone. Very relaxed. The conversation seemed like we were our old selves again. It was nice. I kept the conversation on the subjects we needed to discuss. At the end of the conversation I did talk to her about a few non related things, small talk about what's new in the news type of thing. I had read on Mort Fertel's website that it's good to try to talk for at least 60 seconds to your spouse about something that is not related to your sitch, make small talk. It went well for me today. My W actually participated in the small talk part of the conversation. I ended the conversation and said I had to go and we said we will talk again this week. I was surprised that she didn't try to get off of the phone first. In some past conversations or meetings she would want to end the conversation. Not so today.

I'll continue trying to keep things friendly when we do speak, otherwise I need to back off and give her space.