OIN you need to stop taking her negative stuff to heart, did you read hte mandatory don'ts I posted? Its RIGHT IN THE BOOK.. I worte them out SPECIFICALLY FOR YOU
Your wife needs time and a BETTER HUSBAND, THAT is the treatment.
Let her think she's being watched.. that's fine... just give her all the space she wants.. let her hold yoru phone as well... that's a GOOD SIGN that she doens't trust you.. it means she CARES what you DO.
She isnt' being WATCHED if you include her in your calls to OMW. And you just focus on their marriage and apologize for things getting so difficult. Send them some flowers and put both YOUR names on them and send them to BOTH of THEM. Tell your wife you are doing this... it will score you some points... invite your wife to sign the card or whatever.
