Flowmom, I think the above email is way better than the first. I also think that it is fine to have H go with you instead of a babysitter (if financially not possible) because you would be showing the kids you can get along together as well as squeeze in family bonding without pressure...
me,34 exH,34 S,16 months S:3/31/09-left for OW started DBing 10/09 d final: sometime 10/10 current: http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=2022856&page=1 met in 2004
