Calling out the Piecers

[dday101798]

Just passing by, no significant changes or updates.

But one thing that made me feel great last night and reminded me of all I have learned and saught to change in myself, for myself, and the woman whose chosen to be at my side once again and do the same:

Yesterday became a bit trying, another surprise visit from state social worker regarding S13 after days of him wearing myself and (x)W thin coupled with the root of all evil: financial troubles/concerns had us at a bit of tizzy with the situation(s) and each other.

I found myself withdrawling, shutting down, getting drepressed and feeling hopeless in my own woes. Thus, it was me, me , me and cutting (x)W out of the equation. The very thing that my hand lent in the distruction of our M.

At my lowest moment of the night I was outside having a cigarette pondering things, mainly calling my shrink first thing this morning as I knew the feelings I was experiencing and how I was handeling them would not be accepted well by (x)W.

But then something fantastic happened. (x)W came out. Didn't say a word, nor even looked at me for the matter. I could tell what she was thinking, "he hasn't changed", it was in her eyes and that's when it hit me, I HAVE changed, put my hand up to her cheek and stoked it gently, and I began to smirk, as she grew a warm smile from ear to ear, and I felt, knew, and said, "it's alright, we're going to be just fine".

She teared up for a half second in joy as we exchanged one of the most heartfelt "I love you"(s) in recent memory.

heh, old habit: BUSTED.