Usually a WAW does not want the affection from her H. If your W acts as if she doesn't want it, then just stop it and it doesn't matter what she thinks about what was said. She doesn't want it....period, and that is what "matters".
How can I tell if she does not want it? She hugs me back and a lot of time she gives me a kiss on the cheek or on the lips, but just a quick peck.
Originally Posted By: sandi2
If she hugs you before bedtime, it may just be her way of saying goodnight. (Is it short and then she turns around to do something else?) As long as this is in a walk-away stitch, you wait for her to make the first move. Do not pursue her with any physical affection.
She hugs me back and it is like a 10 second hug right before we go to bed or first thing in the morning if she is up. Sometimes after I get home. Sometimes she even initiates it. The other day I went to bed while she was in taking a bath. When she got out she came in and woke me up to give me a hug and a kiss. I tried not to be overly excited but I was quite thrown when she did it.
It just feels to me like we are on the edge of things getting better and I am just trying to be very cautious. She has mentioned the changes in me as well as family and friends. She is so much happier, but she did confide in me that she is still confused about who she is. I feel that is still a sticking point. I give her as much space as possible so that she can try to resolve that. I took my son out to do some stuff with my family this last weekend and so she was home by herself doing whatever she wanted basically for the whole weekend. She told me that that was nice. I did not even ask what she did or who she was with. That is HUGE for me. I am always asking what is going on and when and with who. She felt it was controlling, I thought it was caring what was gonig on.
Like I said, I am confused as to what to do next. I am trying not to smother the embers like was stated previously, especially since there are some real signs that things are getting better. So I am trying to control my excitement and just keep being happy and hope that the goals I set come to fruition in the comming months.
I just feel lost in that I am not sure what to say or how much to say. I do not know how to be happy and easy going without sharing things with her and waiting for her to come to me. I have never been that way.
