WAW Using God II

[pigskin]

You make very good points robx, I especially liked the one about the plate of food. Thanks, I needed the slap in the face.

I haven't dated but I have gone out a couple times with a woman I find attractive and her friends. The last time I did it I found myself thinking about her a lot the next day, and seeing my W in a negative light compared to her. I actually think it lessened my feelings for my W. It gave me a little bit of insight into where my wife is. My interaction was mild but yet caused me to keep this woman constantly in my thoughts the following day. My W is in a full blown EA and has given her heart fully to another man. I can see how that would COMPLETELY push me out of the picture in her mind.

What I struggle with is that dating while married runs counter to my religious beliefs, and would seem to make me a hypocrite. How can I stand for my marriage while going outside of it? A very difficult thing to do. I also get the feeling that my W would actually be happy about it. "Getting her off the hook" so to speak.

Do I view it as the ends justify the means? If it works to get her back is it then OK? I think those without the same beliefs would have an easier time with this.

That said, my marriage is closer to over than it ever has been. If anything, it would give me a head start on my next life. I have to start viewing my marriage as dead as far as what I can control. What irritates me about myself is that I was at that point and moving on, then got the head fake from my W in the form of a good conversation and a plan to go out on a date. Then the rug was yanked out from under me and now I have to start over. My fault totally, I know. I should have never left myself open to getting that emotional connection back without follow through or proof of a change of heart on her part.

Thanks robx.