how do i keep my hope alive?

[talia]

OTM,
I have never been to RV and I don't really understand what you are trying to Communicate in your post above specifically to TTA. I do however appreciate your feedback of RV - it is a really great program.

I think there might be a core issue missing here. RV concepts are centered around two spouses WILLING to work on the M. That is totally different than what DR addresses - when ONE spouse is willing and the other is not.

RV advice is great - when applied at the right time. In most of the situations in the newcomers forum it is not the right time. RV concepts may do more harm than good if not applied with the right timing.

Remember - right now most of the folks on here have a partner that is NOT willing to work on the relationship - that means that the concepts of an "emotional connection" you are describing from RV is not applicable.

I think your advice to TTA to go to RV is wonderful - I am a big fan of their program! It just might be too early yet - her H isn't there... he needs to be willing to work on the M - by HIS declaration. Otherwise any request to go to RV or any other type of couples counseling is considered pursuing.

This thing works in stages - and timing is everything!!!


T