I also wanted to add for the 7 weeks this has gone on my wife would not once consider what I had to say she did not want to hear my side of anything bottom line was her mind is made up and that is it. And then surprisingly she tells me she wants to listen and hear how I feel and she sounded very sincere and I responded with silence missing my opportunity to getting feelings across to her. How is not talking going to help our R. She has not brought it back up so did I miss my window or opportunity?
If your wife wants to have a constructive talk, you listen to her. If she starts talking about divorce and separation... leave the room.
You can't win that one. IF you do anything other than support her idea, she will accuse you of controlling her.. if you DO support her suggestions tehn you are moving closer to divorce, you can't WIN that...
If she watns to just tell yo she's sad adn confused, certainly hear that.
What you need to tell her is that you made a commitment, you have NOT done well at keeping it, but you are willing to do anything you can to be a bettr husband. Tell her you need to learn HOW... and that you ARE going to FT to learn how to be a better H for her. Don't tell her you love her or anything like that (again right out of MWD's book). Just tell her what you are donig to remedy the situation and that's it. Tell her things will get better as you learn to be better.
