What I find most confusing is WHY in the world my stbx wants to now take credit for my 'Growing Up' or for 'Changing' He has mentioned he sees my changes and he is very proud of me. He says he has never seen me so healthy and he KNOWS that if it weren't for him leaving me that he knows that would never have happened.
I know we are to believe nothing of what they say and half of what they do. When I hear him tell me I am still his Best Friend, that he cares about me, him hugging me etc... this is when I get most confused. It's much easier for me when I don't see him at all.
One day he can be blaming me for his unhappy life and then next as sweet as pie. It's crazy.
The saddest time for me was when I looked at my H telling me he was DONE and I saw Nothing there. He was an empty vessel, hallow eyes with nothing there. I had never seen this before.
I could not for the life of me figure out what happened. Book by book and eventually search engine by search engine got me here to this forum... by FAR the BEST place I have been with the MOST information anywhere. I believe mostly from the ones that have been around for years that really take the time to TEACH us.
I have read MANY books, re: MLC many that are recommended here as well, but the posts are BY FAR the most helpful...not because I read word for word and think that is how it will happen for me, but when your where I am, lost and alone and having no idea what in the world just happened, its a very scary place to be...having Faith in God and leaning on him for Strength does help as well.. BUT having REAL people share REAL experiences and give REAL advice or input has been life changing for me...little by little everyday.
I am so appreciative.
I thank you for continuing to take time out of your busy schedule to sit and share what God has placed on your heart with each of us. You have a very special gift and I believe that God led me to this site so that I could learn as much as I am from yourself, as well as others like Snodderly, OP, JTB, etc.
