I am 100% open to change. I have made (and broken) promises before, but I never had a real understanding of how important it was, and now I do. I'm just terrified it's too late if he no longer even has any desire.
It may be too late or it may not be too late. That is totally something that will be figured out in the mind of your husband.
Since you say that you are open to change, what you can do is figure out how to educate yourself and change yourself so that you will be attractive to your husband or the next man in your life, if it really is too late.
You need to get a life and be the best person and possible mate you can be. If you want to try to save your marriage, there are lots of books, forums on this website. Rather than tearing out pages of SSM, read it carefully and see if you can't do some of the things that she advise the LD partner to do in an SSM. Maybe post a few psges on your refrigerator. If you feel that your husband is about to move out of the house or file for divorse there are other fourms on this website devoted to those issues.
The point is, if you want the marriage, you need to change, convince him that you have changed and that you will be a fun person for him to live the rest of his life with.
So, what is it that you have done to change yourself now that you understand how imporant sex was/is to your husband? Getting up the courage to post on this website is a great first step!
What are your next steps?
Have you discussed the book SSM (which you obviously have) with your husband yet? Have you told him that you love him and want to make the marriage survive and flourish again?
Have you researched any sex counselors and suggested that you and your husband go to one? Have you investigated any marriage enounter type weekend events that the two of you could go to and suggested any to your husband? Have you recently tried to seduce your husband or done something dramatically sexual to change his image of you?
Your posts indicate anger and fear but don't provide any clues as to action. I suggest you transform your fear into positive actions. Don't be a victim. Even if it might be too late, don't you want to at least take some action to try to save your marriage?
I wish you and your husband luck.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
