flowmom | need to commit to myself

[flowmom]

HB, your words are very helpful for me because you are getting at the heart of a lot of the "sticky" feelings that I'm having about how the separation came to be. I am going to have to re-read your post a few times to let it sink in.

When you have a spouse in MLC, it does NOT matter if you turn backflips to fix what they say is a problem, it is NEVER enough.

That does ring true. I did make a lot of changes to address H's issues with me, and he acknowledged them in MC. The MC said that I was making changes and making myself vulnerable and that H wasn't. There was a feeling that nothing I could do was enough. H made it very clear in MC that there were things that he could not accept about me (the lack of earning/procrastination came up quite a bit, because of the financial pit trigger that got us into MC in the first place).