WAW and me in 11th hour!!!!

[Ken62]

Agreed Sandi! It was good for them to hear the truth about the EAs from me but I know that I can not control what they say to the W and I do think that any pressure will be received negatively by her but I also know that I can't control what they talk to her about. I just need to let it go!

Came home yesterday to find my copy of Love Dare and the movie Fireproof moved from the sofa table in the living room to the night stand in my bedroom. I guess W didn't like it out in plain view when she came over to the house. Maybe she feels that I'm trying to manipulate her or something (which I'm not) by leaving it out and she had finally had enough. Too bad she doesn't give me the same consideration when she wears the motorcycle coat over to the house that she got from the first EA. I'm sure that she would see these things as NOT being the same and would have a perfectly logical explanation why her wearing the coat is NOTHING like leaving that book and movie out for everyone to see.

Didn't have my DB Coaching session today with Chuck. He is in the hospital. Will need to reschedule. Hope he is alright!

I also need to vent about W always saying "You want this (D) too because you don't want to be married to someone who doesn't love you completely." Is she trying to alleviate her guilt about the D? Is she trying to make it that it is a joint decision and not just hers? I would LOVE to be able to tell her: "YOU are the one who wants the D, I do NOT want the D. Yes, it is true that I do NOT want to M to someone who doesn't love me completely but I would want to work on the R and the M first instead of just giving up without even trying to fix it" but I guess WAWs don't want to fix it.

W told my D back in November of 09, "When do I get to live my life?" which hurt my D terribly. W said that my D took it out of context. What a pile of crap! Are WAWs trying to "find" themselves? Do they feel that they have lost their identity? Do they feel that they have been living for everyone else and that they want to do something for them for once? Is that why WAW are so similar to MLC?

As always a lot of questions about the state of mind of my W and where she is coming from.

Thanks for letting me vent,

Ken