When my wife was saving for her apartment...I didn't want her money. I actually hated that I couldn't pay the bills myself. Why? I didn't see it as enabling or funding her behavior...I saw it as giving her what she wanted. I wasn't going to move out...so she had to fund moving out herself. I also felt, at that time, if she moved out things would have been more peaceful at home...which was a goal of mine the whole time.
As Jack said to me back then...give her the space she wants and let her choke on it.
