Easy- just make something else up that you wanted to say.
The key here is to not stress her out AT ALL-
There might seems like there's an elephant in the room- but you both know it's there, so it's not even worth mentioning.
Seriously- you are SO fortunate-
Allen's statement about keeping on guard and up front about OM and OMW is spot on...do not get emotional about it or take a defensive posture...state it matter of fact and emphasisze the word protect.
NO R talk, no pursuing, no pressuring, no "hey cant you see I've changed..", etc etc etc.
If I had been posting here 2 months ago and not so focused on the EA, my W would likely still be at home.
Don't mention her hot and cold, or what seems to be unfair, or why am I making all the changes- it will seem very VERY unfair- but you CANNOT mention that.
It is what it is, you keep her comfortable, but not placate her, YOU stay balanced, positive and busy...and her walls will crumble.
You don't make her stay by doing everything and pampering her, but you keep it stress free.
