Hmmm, the way I see going dark/going grey/NC, it's an effort to make them miss you and let them know you're not going to just be there for the taking. By agreeing to these lunches and dinners, it seems like you're allowing her to be connected with you for as long as she likes, just to drop you when you become inconvienient. Are you setting a time limit? It's best to not stay for longer than 1/2 an hour or so and to line something up directly after so you're more inclined to leave. Or simply leave when you're having a great time (leave them wanting more). I know I can say all this stuff, but I've failed repeatedly at all of this in the past as well. Pretty much everything here is easier said than done and part of the reason I've failed so many times is because I couldn't seriously commit myself to the hard work involved.
I really don't have any advice for calming emotions. I know I've certainly let my emotions get the best of me in face-to-face interactions. So I'm finding things to reward myself with when I'm doing well, and trying to find support and encouragement from friends when I fail.
Me: 26 Ex: 27 Son: 5
Divorced: 3/2010 Each day is another opportunity to do it right.
