Don't be down on yourself - be PROUD! You saw what doesn't work, and what does. You're just trying to learn new ways of relating and it takes a while! I"m super inspired by you. I'm going to take a double look at the "DB standards" and compare them to what really is going on in my R with H, what really gets him to open up and come closer. That is truly what needs to happen.
Like last week I didn't know what time H wanted to meet to pick up S, and so I did the DB thing and waited for him to call first. It just muddied communication, which is a huge problem for us too! He went to the house looking for us, while I was out with S waiting for H to call. It would have actually been a better 180 to call and be clear about the plan!
I'm so glad you are getting clear on this, working on it, seeing results! That is fantastic!
