The journey begins

[Gardener]

CTH,

...right now this is a place I get my mail except for when the girls are over.

I hear you even though I'm still home. In the house, actually. Hasn't been a home for a long time. And I, unfortunately (or fortunately) have to keep this bachelor's pad constantly spotless since it's on the market and I never know when it'll be shown. Today I got a 10-minute notice showing!
Don't know where I'll be going next. Sometimes that bothers me; sometimes it excites me.
One day at at time. One foot in front of the other.

[ClingingToHope]

Yes. I cover real estate for a living. I sympathize with people who have had their homes on the market for 12 month or more.

Bad news on that count. I listened to a national real estate expert who said the number of foreclosures on the market should DOUBLE this year.

Already the replacement rate is at 14 months so this is not good. It'll push prices down another 10 to 15 percent.

I really hope you can get out of it before summer when the waves come crashing.

Yes. I hear you on the day to day. There are times I'll sit here and think it's going to be very interesting to see how things play out. My life isn't in a neat little box anymore.

Then there's times I'm just very bitter.

Those are less though.

[Gardener]

CTH,
What's "replacement rate"? Time on market?

[awest1217]

It is awesome that D7 is out playing and making new friends. Maybe D7 and the crazy neighbor's boy will become friends and crazy neighbor won't be as crazy. For D11, just try to encourage her to try many different activities until she finds one that she likes and will do to keep her moving.

[ClingingToHope]

Gardener, replacement rate is the amount of time it would take to sell the current inventory. Where I'm at there were 3,500 houses on the market last month and about 250 sold.

At that rate it would take 14 months to sell all 3,500 houses. Of course, the flood of foreclosures is going to swamp the market and push the replacement rate higher.

AW, there are lots of kids for the girls to play with here. At least for D7. D11 is a little limited, but she'll get involved.

D11 has talked about basketball. She has no hand-eye coordination though.

The other thing is that W would have to sign off on it and she was no help last summer with D7 and soccer and no help this winter with D11 and swimming.

We're not talking about anything but scheduling so I'm not sure how to broach the subject. She still hasn't gotten me all of the tax stuff or returned my emails about summer camps.

[awest1217]

Is there a basketball court D11 and you could go to play at? If it is something she wants to do, at least she will be moving. It doesn't have to be organized, just being active and she loves spending time with you so it could be something you do together.

[ClingingToHope]

AW, what are you doing up at 4:40 a.m.?

This summer I'm hoping to be able to go and do things with D11 just me and her. Running. Biking. Long walks.

I could buy a cheap outdoor basketball to take with a shoot.

One thing we did last year and can continue to do this year is not drive between houses. It's about a mile walk so after I pick them up at camp, when W gets home we'll walk to her house.

Woke up more stuffed up. Time to get D11 out of bed for her final day of the play.

[ClingingToHope]

Journaling. Dropped D11 off at W's for the play and went to church with D7. That was good. D7 really enjoys the kids program.

The pastor was finishing up the "Me I Want To Be" series and stressed James 1:2-4. Now, I'm not very religious, but it struck a chord with me.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything."

The way I took that is that I should be happy that God is testing me -- and this sure is a test.

D7 and I hung out at the library for a while, then ate and went to D11's play.

We saw W at intermission. She came up to try to win a silent auction for D11. She kept getting outbid though.

She wanted D7 to stay there too so it didn't look like she was just standing there to outbid people. She smiled. We both put bids in and then D7 wandered off and I went to find her.

After the play I took D11 and D7 home. W was downstairs collecting costumes.

Once we got home D11 still had homework left. In fact, she's sitting next to me doing it.

W called and I gave the phone to D11 to answer. She said W was bringing a book over.

When she got here she came in and gave D11 a hug. I gave her a smile as she left. She gave me a tired smile and said she was really tired. I said good night.

It's nights like these where I just don't get it. I just don't see why she doesn't want to work on this. It's all such a waste. I want to just drive over there and just demand we talk this over, that we give it one more shot.

But then I'll wake up tomorrow in this apartment and know that she hasn't felt love for me for more than three years. And I'll soldier on.

I have to remember James 1: 2-4.

[NoLongerHere]

It's hard. Stay strong, man.

I do tend to believe that the challenges we have in our life are there for a purpose, for our growth. As much as it sucks, we can take a lot from this experience.

Take care Clinging -

[ClingingToHope]

Some random stuff from yesterday.

I forget how we got on the subject, but D7 asked when W and I are getting back together. I said I don't think we are ever getting back together. I asked her isn't that W has been saying.

She said yes and started to cry.

D11 was very weepy after the play last night. There's always a lot of crying after the run of the show is over. Apparently, a couple of the kids in the cast were in their last play or aren't coming back so she was sad. She takes those things really hard.

She's such an emotional kid. My parents both died before she was born and W's dad died when she was 2. So she has just one grandparent. Every once in a while, if she's feeling down about things she'll say it's because she misses her grandparents.

She signed up for a program of working with seniors through my church. I met with the organizer yesterday and we talked it over and what sounds best for D11 is kind of an "adopt a grandparent" program.

I think D11 will be excited, but it's going to be difficult to follow through. Unless W supports this then it means she'll only do it on my time, which means less time together for us.

We'll see how it goes.

I was thinking last night about the fact by switching weekends I'm not going to have them the next two weekends. That just makes me feel more strongly about going for 50/50 custody.

It's really one extra night a week -- Thursdays. I'll have to be strong because I'm guessing W will get going again on D work now that the play is over.

A bit of good news. I think I'm turning the corner on the annual spring cold.