I would try Shannon McQuade if she is close by... Its at the same place as your H's so that may help too...
Give her a chance at least...
The first FT you had was a moron sorry, anyone that just tells you outright if there's an affair involved to give up they are idiots... MANY marriages THRIVE after affairs if they do the work...
Your IC was just ignorant and tossing negativity at you...
If your H asked me I wouldn't tell him D is "a choice" I woudl tell him
"Divorce is THE LAST RESORT... EVERY other possible avenue for reconcilliation should be TRIED with 100% commitment before even TALKING to a lawyer"
Telling a WS that "divorce is a chioce" legitimizes that escape and more or less tells them its OK.. to a WS, divorce is a choice means "GO FOR IT"
NO counselor should be sharing ANY negative toughts that will DRIVE HOPE AWAY from you... NEVER accept that.
It's a scandal that they get paid to give crap advice like that... but they do get away with it every day...
There are bad mechanics for cars out there too... its not just FT that's messed up
