Start of the end..

[iwantittowork]

Thank you Ant and Gardener, I need the support today bigtime.

I feel I have horribly backslid, and am in a bad spot right now.

I had to sign some paperwork for d9 school, and while picking her up, she was in the car, and I decided to give to stbxw and attempt to talk to her.

Bad mistake.

She was on the phone when I came to the door, and I stupidly asked if she was talking with her boyfriend. That set the tone for the next 10 minutes right off the bat.

We went back and forth on it, and she knows that the only way I could know was having read her emails. I just said you don't know what I know and what I don't know about you, and that I just want to be afforded the courtesy of her telling me before introducing anyone to my d9 in her life. She said she would ask her L if she needed to do that.

Then I tried to discuss finances, and why was she attempting the things she is, and that she is going to ruin me financially, and that is not good for d9 or our situation. To which she said that she didn't have time or patience to discuss this now, and that I was trying to start an argument, and that if I didn't leave now, she would call the police....

I was not arguing, I was just trying to talk to her about our financial future, and that of d9. I was not confrontational in my tone, but just trying to talk to her.

I left after a couple more minutes as it was clear that she is set on what she deserves from me, and that she sacrificed everything for her kids and me in our relationship and that I never did, nor contributed fairly to her life or that of her kids..

I seem to be stuck:

Trying to make sense out of nonsense.
Trying to be sane in an insane situation.