In the other thread you said that you had the need to put her down and lower her self-esteem. Then you added this:

Quote:
From time to time she would indicate that I was mean and that I hurt her and stupid me would just blow it off like it was nothing that she was overreacting and when she told me she would leave in the past I would just think she was bluffing because she would not leave. Turns out she loved me more than I ever thought.


If you really want her, then you need to do a lot of work to become a man she deserves. A lot of sympathy goes to the LBH, but there was a problem long before she turned to another person. If that problem is not resolved then she will either not stay or she'll continue to find OP who will appreciate her and have the self confidence to show her.

It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!