Wait until he gets his job settled. He has enough on his plate. But I wouldn't drop the dream of him understanding WHY it happened in the long run. I agree he needs some therapy to at least learn his own red flags for the future. Or something. Then he will know what to do and have a plan for what to do when and if it starts happening again other than RUN.
But I don't know if now is the time to address it because, as he said, looking for a job is depressing enough! I hope that after the money worries die down that he will at some point in the future be able to empathize and acknowledge with your pain during the separation and how his actions impacted you. Until then, the resentment has to be journalled or dealt with in some way on your end or it will lead to blow ups and ruin the good times. And no, IT IS NOT FAIR!!!!!
