I too am def guilty of focusing on the good in the R. I know that there was alot of places we went wrong and how easily it could have been addressed...
It's very easy for WAS to surround themselves w/ nay-sayers as they have allowed the LBS to be judged w/o a fair representation and perhaps skewed or exaggerated R histories.
If I were a WAS I too would want all the justification I could get to go about my WAS-ing.
It's ironic that while I was discontent w/ the M/R- I would share my negative thoughts w/ collegues- they would jump to a conclusion, but I knew D was not an option for me, so I sided against them and looked for reasons to stay.
Trouble was I too failed to communicate clearly- so when WAW came to me w/ her complaints, my thought was wait- what about my complaints-
Only much more defensive...then the bomb a week later.
It does take two- I know my part and own it and am willing to work on it, WAW is not- and ONLY b/c of the A...otherwise there is nothing to lose.
I am slowly becoming the WAS now- you can only be kicked in the teeth so many times...
I no longer snoop, that's been a huge help in detaching-
