Newmama, your H is the father of your child and he will always be a part of your life and someone who you are connected to. You'll probably always think about him.
My father died when I was 3 and my mother told me when I was an adult that she thinks about him every day, even though she abandoned him before he died (she had good reasons).
I hope that you feel comfortable with sharing your thoughts here. You don't have to DB in the forum, this is your safe place to be honest with yourself about where you are on your journey.
me: 42 | STBXH: 41 | T: 18 | M: 10 | separation: Jan 3, 2010 | they deserve better: S7 & D4 current thread: http://tinyurl.com/3y8sxcp .: first breathe, then heal, then start LIVING :.