Although I'm not sure how it compares as I found out about the first one AFTER I found out about the second...actually in the same very illuminating phone call with OW #2!!!
The first one doesn't even phase me, as it was brief and not quite the "love affair" that the second one was. Plus it was long over by the time the "real" bombs hit.
Not sure if this helps, but you did ask!!!
IMHO everyone has their own limit...some would pull the plug over an EA or a one night stand...it all depends on the couple, and the circumstances doesn't it?
If you're wondering if you're "dumb" or "weak" for trying to work through this a second time, my answer is NO!! Absolutely NOT.
