Tell me this. Has this actually worked for any of you? Has calling the OM's wife actually ended an affair in any case, or does it just destroy another marriage? I took my advice from the "While your wife decides" on the front page. http://www.divorcebusting.com/a_while_spouse_decides.htm. It feels like I'm following a similar path, and that she's making excuses to hang out with me.
I'm trying to remain friends with the most important person in my life. I've battled with contacting the OM's wife, believe me, but with my wife actually inviting me out to do things with her in the next few weeks, and her having the time away to get her mind straight, the last thing I want to do is drive her further away. Yeah, yeah, I recognize what I've been trying hasn't worked, but this IS a different approach. What I tried was smothering, pleading, begging, stalking, etc. I was the jealous husband, and not a friend who recognized her fear and pain. THAT is the approach I'm taking now.
Regardless of what you all say, she is not sleeping with him. There are physical reasons that prevent it in the short term that I don't care to detail here.
The more I think about it, I know it's the right thing to do to contact his wife. I know I would want to know. At least my wife had the courage to come clean. But despite everything that's happened, it is very difficult for me to make a decision that may ultimately backfire and drive her out of my life forever.
Right now I'm trying to get his home number. I still don't know if I'll use it, but at least I'll have it ready if I do.
