The 180 to do is not speak at all about the R, progress, defense mechanisms, or what's standing in the way of progress.
I thought long and hard about my sitch- and a decent R has turned into a broken record of yea buts, and cant you see, and I just dont understand...
And that's my shirt.
Any interaction w/ W has been soured by R talk or me analyzing her/pressuring her.
It does stress her out and it is annoying at best...remember, you need to break the cycle- b/c she's obv not changing her views.
And I know it seems disingenuious to ignore the issues by not speaking about them- BUT start forging the new R by being cool, detached, and just enjoy the time you have w/ her...the more she associates you (or me) w/ stress and angst, the worse off we all will be.
