Positive Moments In Time

[25yearsmlc]

Kevin...you know, most of this is what I've wanted to hear for a long time.

Real talk about your real problems, what the hell you are doing about them, and no longer seeking the approval of others to make normal life choices. (True, we all struggle with the big decisions b/c we don't want to hurt others).

Yes I do worry about the depression and drinking (and backsliding), because I think there's a direct relationship. And you glossed over the underlying issues for so long, I wondered if you were just so used to being melancholy or depending on your wife that you didn't see how unhealthy it was/is, OR whether the idea of facing those fears was paralyzing to you and therefore would keep you stuck and not growing into the man you want to become, and in a dependence mode. Sometimes you seemed unaware of how sad and lonely you sound often.

It sounds like you are now recognizing the patterns more, but hey, this is the first time you've come out and said it this way. I needed to hear it.

And you have made some progress. You make a good point in contrasting where you were some 2 years ago, and where you are now. Stay moving in this direction b/c it's a lot healthier.

Hopefully you will see that in the grand scheme of things, BIG picture, the Church, and God, do not mean for you to be lonely and sad the rest of your life. What that means practically, you'll have to decide...as you should. I'd ask you to avoid that stubborness and rigidity that hasn't been helpful to you, so if a new idea or theory or opinion comes up, it doesn't rock your world too much, or cause the judgementalism to flare up and bite you. I have dealt with that myself, and my eyes are a lot wider now than they were when this all began.

But all in all, like I said, I'm glad you came out and said all this.

So...(drum roll) GOOD! KEEP IT UP! (for the non believers, it's moments like this when I say "Here, Proof there IS a God!")

j-