Well, it has been sometime since I last posted. Mostly this has been due to the sheer size of the task that has been at hand. Undoing 20 years of doing. I have heard it said that a d is not a seperation, that would mean a nice easy split. In realty it is a painful, and, ironically, growth inducing experience tear. And when things tear, there is pain.
Having said the above, there is no way I could have navigated the past 12 weeks without the foundation that was built through dbing which started early in the summer.
In retrospect, there are certainly sitchs in which dbing will help bring back the marriage, but then in some cases, such as mine, it was lost long before I was ever aware.
Soon, my marriage will be nothing more than a memory. A good memeory when I think of the pre "bomb" times. One which gave me my children. And for that will always be thankful.
A dear friend mentioned that several folks had inquired about me over the last few months. Pleas know that i have not been hiding away - rather trying to finish my D. While that may seem the opposite of what this board preaches, sometimes it is the only solution. Sometimes you have to take charge of your own life and do what best for you and your children. That is what i have done.
Soon, I hope, I will be back in a position to add knowledge and insight to others' sitchs. I now have more experience than i ever wanted to have in this area. Especially where it involves an A.
See you back on here soon.
ME 41, Her 41 M 18.5 years T 19.5 years s - 12, 10 Bomb 7/12/09 Inhouse Seperation 7/13/09 - 10/1/09 She moved out 10/1/09 - present
