Okay gang,
Tonights question is one I raised over on Newcomers some months back. No takers. Background: I was talking on Newcomers about sitting in Mediator's office while then STBXW and mediator had a short exchange about what surname STBXW would be using after the D. Well, she didn't like her maiden name, Wouldn't go back to 1st H's surname, though that's her kids' last name (obviously). "No, I'm going to keep Gardener. Mediator: "Okay. Remaining Gardener."

At that moment - and in the back of my mind periodically these last weeks - I'm thinking, "Hello? There's a third person in this room who might want to be at least acknowledged, if not considered, in this little talk: the man whose name it is?!?

I know I'm quite possibly being petty and uncharacteristically chauvinist-sounding, here. but -
Is it unreasonable of me to let my X know that her unilateral decision to retain the surname Gardener is unacceptable to me?

Whaddaya think?
Ladies?

Gardener

"My soul, be satisfied with flowers,
With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them
In the one garden you may call your own."
Cyrano deBergerac