WAH in MLC with PA

[DiamondGirl]

So how do you get rid of the anger? I'm not sure I have enough lumber in the garage to do that...

[DiamondGirl]

Feeling mixed feelings today... Sadness, some fear of what's to come, dread of H's reaction when officer calls (and when he realizes his crossing border activities will be affected)...

Feeling like a little kid wanting to know everything will be okay.. though it doesn't feel like it right now..

[Lostforwords]

DG-

It will be okay...each day it will get better. I think the sadness ad fear comes from setting a very strict boundary...which is hard. You have basically said do not talk or treat me that way again or there will be consequences.

We talk about self growth here a lot and it is important....but sometimes you have to say "enough is enough...I will not accept this treatment anymore". Some treatment you just need to detach from and accept....say calling you a lousy mother....but other treatment like yesterdays phone call is not acceptable.

Good job on taking some power back...because that is what you did.

[DiamondGirl]

Thanks LFW,

I know I did the right thing, because like a teenager, he has to learn that there are consequences to his words and actions. I just didn't want to be the one to make his world unravel. But it wasn't me who did it.. he did with the threats.. and I have to draw the line because I really don't know what he is capable of.
I did find out right after he left that he has a sealed record from when he was young for beating someone up... He never laid a hand on me throughout our R, but the proclivity is there I think.

I know he's hurting and scared and running, but I have to protect myself from that as much as possible.. even legally if necessary.

It's just hard to watch him self destruct this way...

Going to get a recorder tonight if I can squeeze it out of my bank account...

[DiamondGirl]

Just received a brief text from H through work email:
"Comments were uncalled for I'm sorry"

Comments? Try death threats...

Of course I didn't respond at all to it.. And don't plan to..

I doubt that will be the last of it.. but who cares... I'm starting to see what people have meant by MLCer spiralling quicker on the way down...

Anyway...

Going back to working on S13 March Break camp arrangements.. Have to plan/pay for someone to attend with him as it is unsafe for him to go alone (loves swimming too much and might jump in unattended)...

[Drew]

Good job, DG.

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Of course I didn't respond at all to it.. And don't plan to..

Good, you have learned something.

[DiamondGirl]

I'm working on it Jack!

[DiamondGirl]

Now if I could only find a use for all those splinters..

[Lostforwords]

Excellent DG...Excellent