I wish I could meet your H on some ADHD board - I've felt that, too.
I don't know if it was EN...might have been an apology and request for time. Don't feel sad for him, be empathetic. Like the people you're helping on the weekend. Reach out, but not to cry, but to support. That's what a W or H does. Consider it a gift.
Valuing someone's EN doesn't mean anybody has to go last. Making tough choices is tough, and no one 'wins' every time. If you're worried, I'd argue that is your EN at work - you want to reach out and talk or something. Someone told me that it is hard to sit near someone, and want to hug, but you can't yet.
It is his consequence, as long as he's actively dealing with it, maybe just look forward to the weekend? You might need some time to deal with your first point - where your fears lay (in the M or the unknown)... Did you say you had a date with an IC yet?
