Long haul is a good way to put it. I'm 34, so unless one of us dies early, her gma lived to 98!
I've had those "who are you" fears, too. The fact that you've made it till now shows a lot of courage. Yes, your choice of avoidance and 'going dark' didn't seem to be helpful, but you survived. I can't help but wonder if that could have been enough so you could talk to her, listen to her, and make her feel like a respected & cared for person. For me, I've already spend 1 of my 11 years living somewhat apart from her, and the farther apart I got, the less I was able to be patient, kind, etc. to her.
My W felt the IC was on my side more than hers. The counselor did acknoweldge a couple times that she had an easier time understanding my perspective because of a shared culture. I don' think that cut any of the feeling of the MC being a waste of time from her.
It is good to hear that you want to be challenged by your MC, too. There's got to be something that she can notice you might not notice on your own, or her by herself.
Have a great session...maybe it will lead to some "hanky panky"...?
