!Help! Need Advice and encouragement!

[stark648]

The reasons I was going to let her stay at the house were:

>> b/c d15 doesn't want to go over to OM's house.

>> show her I have people I can stay with (dates, friends,
etc?)

>> let her enjoy the things we have at the house that she doesn't have at OM's house and see what she's missing.

I believe I will change my mind on that, however, and not make it easy on her--- like you say, Sandi.

As far as moving on because I've been "dumped", I actually am doing that as best as I can. I will start more dating, but I am not sure if going out with the twenty-something hottie from work is the best move. (but it might be fun)

Wife might get pregnant, which is a pattern for her and relationships---THAT PART REALLY HURTS--so I am TRYING to just assume our M is over, and move on--

My stepson-16 is living over there-and is promised OM's old truck, all the Monster drinks he can handle, late nights all he wants, etc...so he is pretty much sold on staying there.(in more ways than one)

My stepdaughter15 did not like the bum before the affair/relationship, and positively doesn't want to see him.

She really wants me to adopt her, and I am planning on doing just that. One of the reasons is because during some of d15-wife fights, W had threatened d15 with making d15 come to OM's house, OR calling her butt-head biological father in New York and having him come get her to live with him. Wife cusses and calls her some bad names and says really ugly things when they argue (I have not been present during those arguments)

Previously, I had tried to keep them both talking civilly, but now I think as much separation as possible is good-(especially because they are on good speaking terms right now--W needs to miss her)

My d10 is both of ours' daughter---she wants to go over there to see Mom. It had really disturbed her before,(seeing her Mom kissing and cuddling OM), but she is missing her Mom so much, I don't think she cares as much now. I am not sure if it is okay or not for her to go over there, really.

I have stuck with my wife through a lot of times (that usually involved drinking and/or crazy behavior)--but I don't know if I can stand this one for six mos. or two years or forever---

The singles/dating idea/scene just seems to make me sad --I used to date a lot before I got married, but I'm not very excited about it, now...

I am trying to do what God wants me to do--but I can't see the road and I'm not sure I'm on the right path. I'm trying to have faith.