There is another way to look at it - your (and her) screw-ups as a couple led you here, not hers alone. Her exit strategy maybe the biggest problem, but the other problems before today were likely from both of you.
Do you think you've done enough to identify the problems you caused in your M and deal with them?
that is very true. I mean if she were totally happy...I mean 100%...then we wouldnt be in this situation. and so if I had been doing or not been doing the things she found irritating, she would have been closer to being happy. but I dont know that she would have been 100% happy even if I was doing everythign right. The OM pounced...and may likely have still done so had I been doing everything right.
I've certainly identified the problems...and I think I've dealt with them by doing/not doing them anymore. It's kind of like the guy that goes to the doctor and says "Doctor...my arm hurts when I move it like this" and the doctor says... "so dont move it like that".
I have no doubt that my next relationship will be happier/smoother...whether its because I'm not making the mistakes I was making in my last R...or its because the next person I'm likely to be in a R with doesnt have rage control issues and isnt a perpetual teenager.
As I've admitted...I still have feelings for my ex...which is probably why she's able to make me so mad. But at this point I dont see myself wanting her to come home anymore. I'm starting to see her more as a stranger...and an angry one at that. As I said...just having her in the same room as me makes my skin crawl.
That's gonna make the "co-parenting" seminar on Saturday that I have to attend (and pay for...wtf?!?) with my ex interesting.
I just feel so sorry for D3 if my ex does win the custody suit. It bothers me that my ex thinks a smoking and drinking environment with a little domestic abuse and low morals thrown in is a more "proper and suitable environment" for her.
I can only assume with blinders on like that, that she's doing this specifically to hurt me for not being her buddy and making her transition to the OM smooth, and it has nothing to do with the welfare of D3. Thats even more sickening...that she cheated on me, broke up our family, and is still not satisfied with my level of pain.
She (like me) needs a lot of counseling before I would ever...ever...consider letting her back in my front door to live.
