He sounds rigid and compulsive. It's not just a trigger because of the past, I bet. But because he is rigid and compulsive about schedules. Yet that being the case, why didn't he read it?
It's also rigid and compulsive not to allow others to babysit.
Whatever you do, pick the best time of the day to do it and have your one sentence "let's talk about this when we both feel more calm" ready.
