I wouldn't mention anything about her not complaining around the kids....that is just respectful household behavior. Much like I expect you are being respectful about her around the kids. One thing I am positive about...there is no reason to bring kids into this...just look at AYK's thread to see what happens even when you mean the best.
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Should I agree to ask going forward?
If she asks...but the truth is informing/asking her about things like sleep overs is just respectful action. She should know...so there is no agreeing....you should just do it. If for some reason the living arrangements change....then so does this course of action. But for now...still living together...respect her as you would want to be respected (and as-if the EA).
I almost think she is challenging you on the school. Like she expects you not to go...but doesn't want you to go either. A catch-22 and why detaching is so important. You tried to bring the subject up....now is the time to decide purely for you. Things like this pop up all the time in the MLC game. My wife absolutely hated that what I achieved in the house and with the kids. Would comment how I was doing to much....but in the end it was what I needed to do. I am better for it...and you will be better if you go to school..
