Probably won't be posting more here in this thread as I am DONE... finally. I've been lurking for a while in Surviving the Big D. I've accepted that that is where I am... surviving the divorce process. I am not going to try to stop a divorce if I could. Valentine's Day TMs from STBX and the message from OWXH really knocked me down for awhile. I'm grateful for the kind nudges from CB to keep moving forward. I am finally moving forward. Picked myself up and dusted off.
I have to go to a temporary support hearing this Thursday and will be seeing STBX for the first time in several months. I'm not looking forward to this at all. I'll be questioned by his L on my expenses. Ugh. This will not be easy. But I hope to finally get the financial support due to the kids and me.
I just want this all over with. I am done with any thoughts of a R. STBX is a man I don't want in my life anymore. I'm disgusted that he is a man that had an affair with a married woman, broke up their marriage & family and ours, devastated our children and he only cares about making himself “happy”. MLC/mental illness, whatever excuse... I don't care anymore. Any love I had left for him is gone. I loved the person I thought he was and I've been grieving that loss. He's gone. I don't want a man with the kind of character he's shown. I am DONE. It's not just that the A is now a dealbreaker... it's how he's been towards me.
I'm glad I've had these several months to emotionally detach and now have a clear head to go through with the D. At least postponing the D has helped with that.
Springtime coming... symbolic of a new life and renewal—how appropriate. I'm going to survive.
M40, H39 M17 T20 D13, S12 H moved out 05/09 D filed 1/10
Picked myself up and dusted off.
