Education campaigns CAN have SOME impact if you have an open minded spouse... but many are very much set in the romanticized view of infidelity and they will never get out of that
Simple, short "truth darts" are sometimes effective, and about the only thing that you can land thru the fog. Some that I used in my sitch:
- I will not hide your affair. - I will not financially support your affair. - It's your mess, you clean it up. - Send her an email with STD statistics, no other comments. - Secrets kill marriages. - You are being played. - Your current behavior is not helping the children. - "No contact" means "no contact". Working in close quarters with someone who's admitted being attracted to you, and vice-versa, is inappropriate in a HEALTHY marriage. It's absolutely DESTRUCTIVE in one that's on the rocks! - How will you be able to counsel your daughters one day if they're having problems? To cut and run? To have an affair? - You are placing your friend before your husband, and your friendship before your marriage. - Forget ME for a moment; you are not going to like yourself someday if you keep going down this path. - S14 and S10 need you more than ever.
IF SHE TRIES "R" TALK:
DON'T argue past points with her. Simply state the truth of today.
- She is having an affair.
- It is impossible to analyze issues with the marriage as along as she is having an affair.
- You can't analyze a relationship where one partner is making unilateral decisions to bring a third person into the relationship.
- Betrayal is an intensely painful action for one person to inflict on another.
