Hey, D, I've been checking on you sometimes. Don't have much to offer other than my support as I've never gone through piecing. I do think from stuff you've shared about your XW, it seems like she is a partier to some extent. I think she could work on that maybe, for your kids' sakes, but at some point I think you may have to expect that is a part of her, and accept that if you want to continue with her...
